Happy Birthday Grams!!!!!!!

Today was my Grams birthday. I miss her so much. I just wanted her to know that I was thinking about her today and that I wish her a Happy Birthday. She has been away from me for over 9 years. Wow, where have the years gone? Every year at Christmas, I remember a very fond memory for me about her. She was very sick and was in the convalesant hospital. I went to visit her on Christmas Eve. We sat and talked and played a game of Yahtzee. That was always our game. I can remember hundreds of hours playing that game with her. She was so tired that we only played one game. That was our last Christmas with my Grams. And that was the last game we ever played together. I often dream of sitting beside my Grams again, playing our game of Yahtzee. But the memory of her smile that last Christmas Eve will live in my heart forever.

Bummed today

My girls and I see this old homeless man almost everyday. He nevers asks anyone for money, and always seems to take care of himself and his responsibilities. The only time he seems to spend money is on food or doing his laundry. He seems very nice, and keeps to himself. The last couple of weeks we have noticed that his only jacket is torn. Not just ripped, but it looks as if someone literally shredded it to pieces. He still carries it with him and wears it when it is cold. Lately it has been cold often. My girls got the idea to save their money and buy him a new one. So yesterday they bought one. We drove around until we found him and walked up to give it to him while he was shopping for food. He refused it. He wouldn't even listen to us, hear what we had to say, or even look at what it was that we were trying to give him. I got the impression that he was embarrassed. We left the store and left the jacket on top of his stuff outside. When he came out he moved the jacket. He then moved it around several times, picking it up and laying it down. Ultimately, he still left the jacket there and walked away, looking back at it many times. You could tell he wanted to take it, but it was as if his pride just wouldn't let him. We were hurt and disappointed, but I am not sure exactly why. We just walked away confused. We still have the jacket, and have considered trying to give it to him again on another day. After all it was bought only for him. A man who appears to need more help than others, but accepts less help than most.

My Mom

This is my mom Linda. She has been battling depression for quite some time now. She has always been very energetic and outgoing. But right now she needs lots of encouragement and support to help her get well. It is really hard taking care of someone who has depression, besides the physical side, it takes quite a toll on your own emotions. I never knew how difficult it is for those who suffer from depression to get better, nor their loved ones. I support and love my mother everyday, and pray that she finds what she needs to get better and enjoy her life.

Ralf-we miss you already little man.

This is our guinea pig, Ralf. He died just the other day. He was 2 1/2 years old, and we don't know how or why he died. Ralfy was very special to us and we will miss him dearly. We were lucky to have him as a part of our lives for as long as we did. Good bye little man.

Emily Elizabeth Silva

This is my new niece, Emily. She is Ryan and Britini's baby. she is such a beautiful little baby. Anyway she will be 1 month old on Sunday, the 2nd of November. Happy 1 month, Emmy!

My Mom...Isn't she great?

This is a trip we took to Oak Glen. My mom, Linda, always does these kinds of things with the kids. She is quite adventurous in her own way. She rides horses, jumps in jumpers, and plays jump rope among others. She really is a pretty wonderful person. She has been suffering from depression for quite some time now. But I long for the time when she can climb back up on that horse again...

Blog to me...I will listen.

Back when I was 28, I started having some pretty bothersome health problems. Very irregular periods that lasted for months at a time, forgetfulness, lack of concentration, bad headaches, gaining weight that wouldn't go away no matter how much I excercised, and others although none were as bad as the ones I mentioned. I started going to see drs. to find out what was wrong with me. I was certain that I had a thyroid problem, especially since it runs in my family, and I had all the symptoms of it. Everytime I took a test the dr. said my tests were normal and they would give me some other explanation for my illness. They said I was fat, stressed, depressed or even OLD. Yeah, one dr. told me my problems were caused by my being old now. This coming from someone my age, who had just become a dr. People put their life in her hands, Why should anyone trust her, like she said we were old. This went along for a couple of years, back and forth to different drs. never finding any help. I gave up. I figured it was just my destiny to live my life like this. However, I tried once more a couple of months ago. I found a dr. whom I liked, and who seemed to really care, and wanted to help. I took $1000.00 worth of blood tests, and before I went back for my results, he left the practice, and now here I sit waiting again. I am not sure what I will do now, but I feel a little better blogging about it. It's true what they say about talking through your problems, it really does help. Although I needed people to listen, and a shoulder to lean on, I stopped talking to people about my problems, I know they were tired of listening. It's my problem, not theirs. But I know there are thousands of people out there who feel exactly like me, who need a friend to turn to, and I am there for them. Blog to me all you would like, I might not have the answers, but sometimes all it takes is someone who tries to understand where you are coming from to make a world of difference.

Just another day

Well I had a great day today. But nothing special, I guess. I spent the day doing errands and working on building my customer base for Avon. I started selling Avon a couple of months ago, but I have been really buckling down on it lately. I made 4 new customers today. I also took my girls to their school carnival. That was quite nice. They had a lot of fun. They got soaked on the water slide and walked around wet all day and for them that is great fun. But spill a sip of water while they're drinking and all h*** breaks loose. Ha, Ha. Now I am getting ready to work on my quilts for a while. I am making the girls each a patchwork quilt out of their old sentimental clothes. They are coming along nice. I will put up pics when I am finished, but don't hold your breathe, it could be a while. Ha, Ha.

My gadgets...

I thought you might be interested in knowing why I chose the gadgets that I posted on my blog. Well for starters, I love the Simpsons, and have every season made thus far. I chose You Tube, because I am an often visitor of that site myself. They are an excellent source of music, and give great opportunity to the world to show off their creativity. I love football, and my favorite team is the New England Patriots, and for college ball I love the USC Trojans. Inside my own head is a vast amount of useless knowledge, most of which I never use, but throw it out there for all to hear. I am amazed at myself sometimes, I don't even know where I learn most of it at, so of course I chose to share it with the world.

My girls...

I thought you might like to meet my girls. This is Shyann and Kat on our trip to Universal Studios. They are very special to me, help out a lot, get good grades, and give my life meaning.

My family that left...

This is Bruby, my uncle, Freddie, my brother, and my Grams. I miss them with every breath. My girls and I carry these photos around with us on our iPods, and their memory around in our hearts, because we want to have them with us for always. Each day the pain of losing them gets easier, but living without them gets harder. I send them all my love, and pray that they know how much I miss them.

MDA-Muscular Dystrophy Association

The Jerry Lewis MDA Labor Day telethon started today. This is a fantastic program that I enjoy watching every year. Jerry Lewis is raising money to help those who live with Muscular Dystrophy. The MDA can use all the help they can get. If you are interested in donating (anything you can give would help), the number is 1-(800)-457-4400. I know I will be calling.